From animal encounters to restroom emergencies, use this list of 50 things you shouldn't do in the open water to avoid danger and angering fellow swimmers.
1. Swim alone.
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2. Assume boaters and windsurfers see you and will move for you.
3. Assume conditions get better.
4. Take coral from a reef.
5. Pollute the ocean.
Find:
Your Next Triathlon6. Leave trash on the shore.
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7. Skip acclimatization and just "gut it out."
8. Assume additional layer of bioprene (natural fat substance) to keep you warm is good enough without proper acclimatization to cold water.
9. Assume you know more than the local swimmers.
10. Try to outswim a pack of experienced swimmers.
Find:
Your Next Triathlon11. Trip on a seashell or in the sand during an onshore start.
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12. Trip and fall short of the finish line on an onshore finish.
13. Miss a turn buoy.
14. Continuously slap the feet of the lead swimmer while drafting.
15. Ignore the shape of the pack while racing.
Find:
Your Next Triathlon16. Swallow lots of water.
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17. [If an elite woman], go out slowly.
18. [If an elite man], go out fast.
19. Ignore the command of the referees.
20. Ignore railroading when possible.
Find:
Your Next Triathlon21. Bring only one pair of goggles to a race/swim.
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22. Forget Vaseline or lanolin on possible chafing spots.
23. Get Vaseline or lanolin on your goggles.
24. Zipline another swimmer.
25. Smear sunscreen over your race numbers.
Find:
Your Next Triathlon26. Expect toilet paper in a portable toilet minutes before a race.
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27. Ignore or argue with escort boat pilots.
28. Eat new foods on race day.
29. Try a new swimsuit on race day.
30. Talk during the pre-race instructions.
Find:
Your Next Triathlon31. Keep swimming if your vision narrows.
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32. Ridicule those who wear neoprene.
33. Retaliate.
34. Ignore your core.
35. Forget flexibility.
Find:
Your Next Triathlon36. Breathe only on one side, always.
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37. Impede, scratch, pull, cut off, veer into, slap, whack, obstruct, interfere, punch or elbow others.
38. Cross the path of surfers, windsurfers or boaters.
39. Swim behind a boat.
40. Be a pirate swimmer.
Find:
Your Next Triathlon41. Not bring food or gels to replenish energy stores on a long swim.
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42. Yell shark and point to it from the escort boat.
43. Urinate on jellyfish stings.
44. Use an EpiPen (epinephrine) on box jellyfish stings.
45. Draft off a pace swimmer.
Find:
Your Next Triathlon46. Argue with a hallucinating swimmer.
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47. Shine a bright light on a swimmer at night.
48. Ignore a whistle when swimming in the open water.
49. Touch a Shark Shield that is on in the water.
50. Grab the fin of a baby dolphin.
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